Crying

We cried alot yesterday. It's exhausting. At the same time, when you get cancer communication becomes easier and imperative because a lot of the petty shit does not matter. I thought back to the day my Dad died. My sister was standing at the curb in a little tan smock with her hand in her pockets shifting side to side. I was coming home from school and she had been standing there for god knows how long. I knew right then something was wrong. I know that look. I am the only person that really knows her in some ways. She has that same look with me now. That is why she has been cryng. She is sad and I know you aren't supposed to cry on front of the sick but it is ok. I know she loves me.
The nausea has gone away but the insomnia remains.
My stomach was so distended yesterday that I could not put on pants and it hurt. It has gone down some. Still trying to dynamite the poo poo. This morning my tummy was less swollen. I have to eat and drink small amounts slowly because it sits at the top of my stomach and doesn't go down. I tried to take polyethelene glycol for the constipation but I can't drink that much liquid at once.
So that's it for this morning... maybe more later. I might try and do another small outing.
happy sunday.