ok here we go

Motherfucker. I was sick for a week and in the hospital for three weeks. i have lost 61 pounds/ I am a 6 but i have to wear 10's for the tumor tummy. The last drug Ifosamide almost killed me. It killed some tumor but I could not speak for three dys/ I hallucinated/ I threw up all day for 2 weeks. i am NPO ( nothin by mouth) for infinity. I sneak and drink gatorade but if I swallow icey drinks the tumors HURT. SO I drink it lukewarm. I get my food through a bag. They put a centtral line in my arm. No more sticks or ivs YEs!!!!!Not so bad. I take tiny bites of things ( gelato) to try and feel normal... whatever that is. I have the most sympathy for all of you that have been so sick. I hope this is working because now I have necrotic kidneys and nephrotic kidneys.... yay/// stints to drain kidneys into the bladder just make me quiver with excitement. But there is always a new preocedure , most of them don't hurt so bad you just don't know. To date the 2 worse things were the uteruine biopsy  and the ct urogram. So far 7 cat scans 2 MRI's, biopsys on and on and on.
I guess what I am saying is I almost died again......again... I am not even catholic and I pray to St. Jude every night. I get up and put on my game face and fight but somrtimes reality smacks you in the face.
Hey all you IATSE 479 member don't bitch about the insurance C2 has rocked $567,000 so far and i have paid $712.... So don't be cheap and get the C3.
Back to me, because this all about me, thanks for all the well wishes and visits. I really appreciate that.
Irby you and Julie look fantastic. I was delighted to see you guys.
Going to the beach for a week and then I am start the dreaded ifosamise course but with a different dosage. Cross your fingers.....
So here is my playlist for today. It just is how I am feeling

Sympathize- Amos Lee
Gotta cheer up - Cotton Jones
Where to Now st. Peter- Elton John
Nightengale- Norah Jones
Theivery Corporation- Lebanese Blonde
The Beatles- While My Guitar gently weeps
Ray LaMontagne-For the summer
Coldpaly-A message
Tired Pony-Dead American Writers

This is what I am holed up listening to. This is exactly how I am feeling....
Ok enough for now....
Peace out...
Time for a new fintenal patch and an oxy...
night night